11 super significant science secrets

Most scientific complexities can be solved with these simple secrets.

  1. The more novel your findings, the more likely your grant will be triaged.
  2. Sisyphus was a graduate student.
  3. Let your leftover lunch rot in the break room. If your career in biochemistry fails, you may have one in microbiology.
  4. Experiments fail for a reason. Or no reason at all.
  5. Liquid nitrogen is an extremely efficient, though somewhat expensive, floor cleaner. Acetone is not.
  6. Isoamyl alcohol may be poison, but it tastes great over pancakes!
  7. If you lose track of your tubes while pipetting, just keep going. Your experiment wouldn’t have worked anyway.
  8. The UV light box is cheaper than a tanning salon.
  9. There’s no idea too grand, no thought too profound, and no concept too bold for your PI to shoot down in 5 seconds.
  10. The tube you’re looking for can easily be found in the last row of the last column of the last box you check.
  11. Dying is easy. Science is hard.

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Greg Schindler

Greg has a BA from Stanford (English/Football) and MS from Oregon (Journalism). He's our Director of Marketing and Pastries.